“I almost ruined it with Scott,” my client Jessica confessed during our coaching session, her voice shaking slightly. “We had three amazing dates – deep conversations, genuine laughs, that spark we all hope for. Then he got all busy with a work project and his texts slowed down.” Jessica described how panic set in immediately. […]
What’s the difference between accepting healthy uncertainty in relationships versus tolerating mixed signals and dysfunction?
Today’s Ask Melissa Question: What’s the difference between “accepting uncertainty as a natural part of dating and relationships” versus subjecting yourself to dysfunctional relationship dynamics like remaining involved with someone who sends mixed signals? This is a great question. And it reminds me of when I was helping a client debrief a dating experience where […]
When You’re Grieving the Relationship That Could Have Been
Three days after returning from what should have been a dream European vacation, Natalie sat in her apartment surrounded by unpacked bags and a grief she never saw coming. Her phone still held photos from those vibrant cities, right alongside four years of memories with Ryan. The man who had been her emotional anchor through […]
“If My Partner Loves Me, He Would Know What I Need”: How This Belief Actually Prevents Deep Connection
Emma was curled up on the couch next to Alex, their feet tangled under a cozy blanket. The TV was on, but Emma’s mind was somewhere else entirely. She kept stealing glances at Alex, who was laughing at something on the screen, totally clueless to the anger brewing inside her. You see, Emma had this […]
When He Doesn’t Tell You What He’s Really Thinking and Feeling: How to Take the Guesswork Out of Relationship Communication
Ever found yourself guessing what your partner’s silence means? Or trying to figure out if there’s more behind that “I’m fine” when deep down, you feel he’s not all fine? We’ve all been there, right? Trying to mind-read in our relationships, thinking it shows how connected we are. But let’s be real, how often does […]
Understanding the Pleaser Syndrome: How to Love Without Losing Yourself and Escape the Pleaser Mindset
Hello there, beautiful soul, Have you ever caught yourself automatically saying ‘yes’ when deep down, a part of you was screaming ‘no’? It’s almost as if there’s a persistent voice nagging you and warning you into putting others’ happiness before your own. If this resonates with you, know that you’re not walking this path alone. […]
How to Stop Overthinking in Your Relationship
Years ago, I remember when I was leaving for Costa Rica for a couple of months and my boyfriend at the time had said goodbye to me in such a sad and withdrawn way. We already had a roller coaster relationship. But it really left me thinking about why he said it that way and […]
How to Get Him to Invest More in the Relationship
Dear Melissa, I keep running into non-committals! My dates are going great with this laid back warm and gentle kind man who I’m 100% attracted too. The chemistry is HOT and such a relief after my unloving marriage. He’s shared how crazy it feels to connect like we do. I have been seeing him for […]
How to Navigate the First 3 Dates So You Find Love Faster and Avoid Wasting Your Time
Have you ever spent hours on a first or second date, only to end up disappointed because you realize you’re not a match or he ghosts on you? Either way, it’s hard not to feel like you’ve wasted your time. It can weigh on your morale, start to make you feel jaded or tempted to […]
How to Tell If You’re “Too Picky” With Guys or Settling
“Am I being too picky with guys?” “How do I know if I’m settling??” I hear these questions in my client sessions often. These questions are very closely related because they stem from the same issue: unmet needs. If you’re passing on dating some men, it’s likely because you’ve seen or experienced with your date […]